"Goodnight," Imma said to the photos of my Grandmother as she walked up the stairs to her bedroom. Imma, which is Hebrew for mom, was not ready to say goodbye to her mother who passed alone in Israel amid COVID-19. Due to the pandemic, Imma couldn't hold her mother as she died. She lights the remembrance candle every day and she prays over the Shabbat candles every week as Grandma did. Both joy and grief have come in waves. My whole life, Imma has held me. Now, I hold Imma.